Methods For Improving Listening Skills

1. Check attitude and atmosphere. Be open and listen to the speaker. Set aside your opinions and reserve judgment until the speaker is finished. set an atmosphere that ells the speaker you are interested in what he or she to say, and you are ready to listen.
2. Keep the channel open and avoid short circuits. Listen to order as you would want them to listen to you. Have You ever talked with someone and felt that he or she was not really listening to you? Have you ever been counseled by someone only to have the phone ring, other people interrupt, or the counselor seem preoccupied with something else? Could this send a message the counselor doesn't really care to listen to you? Have you ever done this to someone you were counseling?
3. Listening demands responses on the part of the listener - the kind of response that reassures the speaker they are being received and interpreted. Do you ask questions to ensure you understood the entire text? Do you keep quiet because you are afraid of appearing foolish or inattentive?
4. Keep the door open. Let the person know you are prepared to listen again. Do you keep the door open or slam the door by your reactions or words?
5. Try to understand the intent and listen for the main points and summarize mentally. This will compensate for the barrier of partial listening. Concentrate the extra thinking time on the message itself and on the intent of the speaker. Summarize mentally the verbal and nonverbal message sent by the speaker.
6. Listen now and clarify later. This will compensate for the barrier of emotional blackouts. You may find the speaker is more on your side" than you thought. However, if you are tuned out because of an emotional trigger then you may miss a clarifying point the speaker makes later.
7. By listening and thinking, you can elaborate on the simple message by directing attention to the missing segments and by making more subtle interpretations. Few messages will be exactly tuned to your wavelength. Some will be complex and others too simple. By listening and thinking you can fill in the missing segments. Filling in the missing segments will help you to better understand the message the speaker is trying to convey.
8. Concentrate on the message, not the person. Concentrating on the message and not the person will help you to compensate for the speaker dismissal. If the person has something to say it doesn't matter if he or she is short or tall, fat or thin, colorful or drab. Unless you listen to the message you won't know if it can assist you personally in your work situation, or in a way you never considered.
9. Mentally trade places with the speaker and analyze your reactions when you realize you're pretending to listen. If you mentally trade places with the speaker this will help you compensate for the barrier of faking attention. How do you feel when someone is ignoring you when you are speaking? Do some of your reactions include frustration, confusion, hostility, and defensiveness? Trade places with the speaker and permit him or her the courtesy of your attention.
10. If you listen attentively, you can usually remember the three or four main points the speaker hoped to communicate. Listening attentively can help you compensate for pencil listening. Use your pencil to note ideas and a few facts. Forget the detailed notes unless you plan to give the same speech. In this case, ask the speaker for a copy of their speech or notes